In our last post, we shared what all practitioners of Body Knowledge already know: our emotions reside in our body. We think because we respond verbally either by voice or on our digital keyboards, that the reaction comes from our minds. Perhaps the details of the expression are mental, but the intention behind them is totally physical!

All the more reason to get to know your body at a more personal level. In earlier posts, we’ve discussed the power of the pause, but with current instant between social interactions online, it takes more than a simple pause to sort things out in order to avoid trouble (trolls?) online.

Certainly, a pause is an immediate positive reaction when you perceive an insult, disrespect, a slur directed at you or someone you love.

So what do you do with the pause?

Feel your blood pressure rise?

Feel your shoulders tighten?

Feel your head begin to throb as you compose an angry retort to post as soon as the pause is over?

Every one of those emotional reactions occurs in your body, but what do they mean?

Really mean: your feelings are hurt and you will react in one of three ways: flee, freeze or fight back.

Your weapon of choice will be the words you respond with online. In order to make them the right words, our recommendation is to consult with your best friend forever, your body.

How to do that, and so much more, is available to you when you access your body’s wisdom and intimate knowledge of you. Your authentic self, your best self, your true self can be discovered in ongoing communication with your body.

Learn how with the Body Knowledge System®

The Body Knowledge System® makes it easy, fun, and worthwhile in today’s digital, informational social system. For more information, please contact Coach Stephanie Wood for a pleasant conversation about how to get in touch with your intentions without fear or frustration.

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Do you ever ask yourself….

‘How can I lose weight and still feel comfortable in my body as we are in the process of transforming each other?’

The other day I was talking with a friend. She mentioned a time in her life when she weighed about 20 pounds more than she ever had.

My immediate thoughts:

I was waiting to hear her shame her own body with phrases like,

• “I look so disgusting.”
• “I hate myself in the mirror.”
• “I just want to look skinny again.”

But here’s what surprised me!

She talked about her body with respect and love. She said she didn’t feel as healthy or strong with the extra weight. She said she stopped caring for her body the way she had before.

In other words, this friend was listening to her body rather than judging her.

This is the core of the Body Knowledge System®. She gets it and practices it. Yeah!

This is the process I want for those of you who are listening and want to know more.

So, instead of setting out to lose weight and get thin again, she set out to love her body by listening to what she needed. And the result was feeling comfortable with the weight her body and she wanted. I am so excited for my friend!

Side note:

She said the results were not overnight, but she believes that by reconnecting with her body and embracing her Body Knowledge System® Style she redefined her relationship with her body to create the new process of eating to allow each other (her and her body) to breathe and find a common ground of acceptance.

During this process of implementing and acknowledging her Body Knowledge System® Style she simply spoke of how amazing she feels! And she also likes how she looks.

And by knowing her Body knowledge System® Style the weight loss was easier and looking and feeling with her body had renewed energy and acceptance.

Check out the link above for the Body Knowledge System ® Style guide around Eating and You.

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“A New Model: What Confidence, Beauty, and Power Really Look Like” by Ashley Graham debuted this week with a national publicity tour and rave reviews.  As the voice of the body positive movement, Ms. Graham has expanded her modeling career to include television appearances and becoming a clothing designer and entrepreneur to prove that curvy girls can do it, too!

Since there are more curvy girls and women than stereotypical runway models, publishing this book is another step forward to ending body shaming forever.  As the Barnes & Noble’s review of “A New Model” says,

“A woman who proves that when it comes to beauty, size is just a number, she is the voice for the body positivity movement today and a role model for all women—no matter their individual body type, shape, or weight.”

A model since aged 13, Ms. Graham almost abandoned her career at age 18, when her mother told her, “It doesn’t matter what you think about your body, because your body is supposed to change somebody’s life.”  A decade later, she affirmed her mother’s sage advice in an interview in the current issue of VOGUE magazine,

“I’ve used my body as a tool to talk about taboo subjects, such as cellulite or being insecure about lower belly fat—and also [how to] talk life into your body and have an affirmation kind of conversation with yourself. ”

You, too, are a champion for Body Confidence through your use of the Body Knowledge System ®.   To find out how, contact Stephanie Wood.

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Who knew that for “so many years I’d go to bed and be like, ‘Please wake up with Kate Moss’ body,” said reality star Kelly Osborne to USA Today in Tuesday’s interview for her book launch.  She continued to say, “Please wake up with all these different things that would make me accepted and fit in…and it’s so miserable.”

Photo credit: Jordan StraussInvisionAP

Those miserable feelings of not fitting in because of our appearance may be the only thing we have in common with Kelly Osborne and other celebrities who appear regularly on talk shows, podcasts, and book covers to share their body shaming stories with the rest of us.

Who knew that behind the couturier clothing, $300 haircuts, and fabulous appearances at the “in” places to be, those women we envy share moments of misery based on the false pressure to be something they aren’t: Perfect.

After many years of therapy, Kelly concludes “It’s Ok not to be perfect.” Some of us already know that and without years of therapy, because who can afford all those hours spent on some high paid professional’s couch to tell us what we already know from our body’s knowledge?

We are already flawless! Excellent in every way!

How do we know? When we communicate with our bodies, she tells us so!

All we must do is listen!

How to we listen?

We get up and move! Try it now:

• Stand up,
• Breathe in,
• Reach up,
• Breathe out,
• Step up!

There, feeling “excellent”!

If not there yet, repeat.

That’s your body knowledge in action.

For more information, contact me!

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The essence of my Beauty Knowledge System is changing the conversation with yourself. Together we learn to communicate with our bodies and the result of that communication creates a natural approach to body confidence.

This concept is catching!

Award winning psychologist, Dr. Renee Engeln, PhD, based her new best seller, “Beauty Sick” on solving our cultural body shaming crisis with changing the conversations with have with each other, with our daughters, and with ourselves.

Dr. Renee Engeln’s  “Beauty Sick” addresses the harm body shaming does to all women’s body image. Her Tedx talks on that damage have received over a quarter million viewers. After identifying the far reaching negative effects on women, she provides realistic solutions to recovering our power, our promise and our true selves.

“Today’s young woman face a bewildering set of contradictions when it comes to beauty:

• They don’t want to be Barbie dolls but, like generations of women before them they are told they must look like them.
• Angry about the media’s treatment of women but, hungrily consume the very outlets that belittle them.
• Mock modern culture’s absurd beauty ideal and make videos exposing Photoshopping tricks, but feel pressured to emulate the same images they criticize by posing with a “skinny arm.”
• Understand what they see isn’t real, but still download apps to airbrush their selfies.
• Ready to fight back against their beauty sick culture, they need a way forward to create a different world for themselves.” Amazon Review

Every woman in the world knows the symptoms of beauty sickness. Every time she compares herself to the image on a screen, on the pages of a magazine, on an Instagram image on her cell phone, her negative reaction to her own appearance is a symptom of the national epidemic.

It will “take a village” to cure this cancer assaulting our self-esteem.

Become a part of the promise guaranteed by a better body image, one confident woman at a time!

Contact me, and together we’ll Stop the Body Shaming Now!

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This week I want to present you with “The French Option.” Now, if your mind goes straight to carbs and wine . . . just hear me out!

Bringing Up Bebe

In her book, “Bringing up Bebe,” American journalist, Pamela Druckerman points out the differences between French women and American women when it comes to food and body image.

She suggests that American women are going about it all wrong…that we could really learn something from the intuitive approach French women have towards their bodies.

This thought is synchronistic with my Body Knowledge System® which promotes listening to your body bringing better results within your lifestyle choices.

Yesterday I took a walk with a young, American mom. She talked about food like it was an enemy. She compared herself to other women on the walking trail.

I couldn’t help but think that Druckerman was onto something.

The American Woman on a Walk

American women tend to have an all or nothing approach. Here are some examples I heard from my walking partner yesterday:

• “See those women running? I could never run that fast so I just don’t even try.”
• “If I ever did go for a run, it’d be toward some chocolate.”
• “Oh, I can’t have a bag of chips in my house…I’d eat the whole thing”

The French Woman on a Walk

French women listen to their bodies. They indulge cravings in moderation and incorporate physical activity into their daily lives. If my walking partner had been French, here’s what I think she might’ve said:

• “I don’t enjoy running, but I like to walk with friends and family.”
• “See that ice cream shop over there? Sometimes I like to stop in and enjoy a scoop”
• “I just have a few chips whenever I want them. That way I never feel deprived and eat the whole bag.”

You on a Walk

Do you see the difference?  With hardcore diets and exercise, failure is inevitable. With failure comes negative self-image and the cycle repeats itself.

Intuition and balance make life more enjoyable and success attainable. With a fuller life and achievable goals comes true body confidence.

Are you ready to break the cycle of negativity and find true happiness in your own body?

Download my free eBook today!

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This week I want to talk to anyone who is sick and tired of reading blog posts that tell you a bunch of information but don’t actually help you implement anything.

You been there before? You read something, you feel sort of empowered or encouraged for a few hours, but then nothing changes.

You fall into the same old patterns and habits.

You read more blog posts. Nothing changes.

If you’re sick and tired of this cycle… if you’re ready to see real change… if you’re ready to experience true body confidence, no matter your age…

Let’s just cut to the chase.

For women over 50 who want to embrace their body confidence, a system DOES exist about HOW to gain confidence in a practical way.

In Chapter Five of my book, Body Knowledge System®, I explain the Four (4) Body Knowledge System ® Styles: Organized, Analytical, Spontaneous, and Inspirational.

After years of observing and working with my clients, I developed the following Body Knowledge System® Styles. Circle each one that applies to you.  Give it a try right now! 

Let’s us know in the comments below!

Organized

• You are at your best when everything has an order.
• You are punctual. You are committed to being on time.
• You like rules and routines.
• You are happiest when you feel organized.
• You take on projects first by setting a schedule and establishing a routine.
• You like keeping a journal or a log. It’s important to you to track daily progress.

Analytical

• You love complexity. You don’t shy away from it. Rather, you like to take a concept, break it down and study it.
• You enjoy working out problems and learning the principles and theories behind them.
• Your goal is to be competent at whatever you do.
• You love a challenge.
• You are imaginative, but you like for things to make sense.
• You are most receptive to a new experience when Everything is explained to you.
• You like to have numbers and facts to back up statements and beliefs.

Spontaneous

• You see life as fun. You like to play.
• Your strategy is always changing.
• You are not attracted to organized rules, and you don’t like complicated rules.
• You will follow rules if they are simple.
• You are willing to change the rules if circumstances change.
• You need the reasons you do things to be natural.
• You like to do things at the spur of the moment.
• You love people. You are motivated by activities with people.

Inspirational

• You like to create an environment that puts other individuals in a position to learn or take action.
• You like it that others look to you for inspiration.
• You are creative.
• You are concerned about helping others’ personal growth.
• You gravitate toward mind-body principles.
• You like to believe anything is possible.
• You are at your best when you focus on the positive.

Once you understand which styles are a good fit, you’ll be able to embrace your strengths in a practical way. 🙂

The Body Knowledge System® is a map, a map that you make your own.

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How to Attract Your Better Body Image with Coaching

Everyone knows the first answer to a personal question is rarely the best answer rather it’s the answer that comes off the top of your head when asked anything about yourself. For instance, “How are you?”, “Fine, or good, or OK” are the standard responses whether we have a fever of 101*, just received a speeding ticket, or are nervous about an upcoming job interview. To get to the central issue requires a few follow up questions, i.e. “really?”, “You don’t look ‘ok’”, or “Why are you sweating? It’s chilly in here.”

Your Best Friend would ask you those follow up questions. I know one thing for sure, when talking to yourself about your body, there is NEVER a follow up question, because you think you already know all of the answers about your own body, and some of those answers leave you feeling bad and therefore are not right.

In my years of coaching experience, I understand the hesitation in prying into those nooks and crannies of a painful past, shameful self-image, or reluctance to change behavior. However, if improving your body positive image was easy, there wouldn’t be all of those articles, interviews, speeches from celebrities and others about body pressure to be perfect. Not a perfect you, rather a perfect beauty like those you see in the media.

BASTA! ARRETTE! STOP!

Few of us have the courage or confidence to stand alone against the social pressures aimed at selling us perfection through various products and services, and yet, when we buy into that marketing, the results are like putting lipstick on a cat. The lipstick may be a beautiful color, applied artfully, and enhances the skin tone—but the lips still belong to a cat! It’s not enough to succumb to other people’s standards for other people for you to achieve confidence; the only way to have the presence confidence inspires is to discover it within yourself. That’s where your body has the knowledge to create the poise you seek. Now all you need do is access it.

The good news is you are not alone. You are not alone in your frustration to elevate your confidence through a better body image; not alone in feeling shame around those extra pounds; not alone in the fear that arrives with every new candle on your birthday cake; and not alone as soon as you make a habit of including your body in your everyday life. I mean learning to talk to her, listen to her, and share with her on a regular basis.

Until you master your personal body knowledge system, you will be missing all the benefits your body brings to everyday of your life. And that’s where a Coach comes in to guide you, support you, and help you accept yourself for the wonderful unique individual you are! When done well, it’s not a painful process rather it’s a delightful journey to self-discovery.

“And what else?” is there to the process…

“And what else?” is the body positive question to ask when you want to get to clarity. It’s the one question you should be asking yourself, and probably aren’t, in order to clarify how you and your body want to be in the world. Using the Law of Attraction, the practitioner identifies what she really wants for herself through the contrast to clarity process as it applies only to herself, not to some idealized version of someone else.

When you accept your body as your friend, in fact your bff (best friend forever), it’s a short step to feeling good about your appearance.

Friendship implies acceptance, as well as a sincere desire to want what’s in your friend’s best interest. Applying the contrast to clarity Law of Attraction principle works when you arrive at the answer that satisfies both of you, you and your body.

To achieve your positive body image faster:

• Include your body in the conversation
• Include the powerful question, “And What Else?” into the process
• Practice feeling good about yourself daily

PS: what begins on the inside, shows on the outside.

I encourage you to include your body in your search for clarity.

After attending my popular class by phone, ‘Resist exercise? Want to know Why?,’ my client Martha called to ask me to help her find an exercise or exercises that would work for her, long term.

“It’s not about “Just Do It!” I said quoting Nike’s famous slogan, “It’s about asking your body what she wants to do to accomplish the same thing.” I truly believe that when you learn to ask your body what she wants, the two of you will get on the same page, and start achieving the things you desire!

Using the contrast to clarity principle to narrow the possibilities, getting the answers from Martha and her body, we determined what movement suited BOTH of them to achieve a positive body image.

For instance:

• What movement makes you feel good?
• Do you prefer working out alone, with another or others?
• When do you enjoy exercise?

Let’s take the first question: What makes you feel good?

1. Sitting, and what else?
2. Walking, and what else?
3. Stretching, and what else?
4. Floating, and what else?
5. Scuba, and what else?

Soon, it became apparent that Martha was not into anything involving exertion, or sweat or at least, her answers didn’t indicate “exercise” in the physical sense of the word. So, it was time to include her body in the conversation.

After getting used to the idea of her body as separate, an equal, and full of great advice, Martha asked her body the same question:

What movement makes you feel good?

1. Moving gracefully, and what else?
2. Dancing, and what else?
3. Winning!, and what else?
4. Swimming underwater, and what else?
5. Body tired from productive motion, i.e dancing, tennis, Scuba

Aha! Martha’s body held the final answer for both of them: Productive movement, with or without an element of competition.

The second part of the important question is…..Listening for an answer

In personal and professional relationships, we all know the first answer is not the only answer, and rarely the best answer. That’s why remembering the question – And what else? as a follow up question always provides deeper answers until you reach the heart of the issue.

Listening for your body’s answer to the powerful question, “And What Else?” requires another shift in your perspective. It forces you to listen for the answer from your body rather than override her input with your first, second, or third response. Where your body image comes from is more than your thoughts and feelings about your body, it begins within your body and it’s time or past time you begin to listen to her to get to the final answer for both of you.

As comfortable as you are being in control of your life, include your body by asking her this follow up question so that you are forced to relinquish your power over her as you await her answer.  Better body image coaching is not an either/or, black/white, yes/no process between two opposing entities who have not communicated with each other since childhood. Rather it is a process of reestablishing the intimate relationship between you and your body you had as an infant—the most effective and efficient way to activate the Law of Attraction.

The answers to this question are between you and your very best friend, your body. So there’s no need to shy away from the difficult questions about what you want for your body, and perhaps are “afraid” to ask? The basic principle of improving your body image through coaching is total trust and ease of communication between you and your body. The openness between whatever question you ask of your body and the answers you receive will create the positive energy to actually accomplish your basic goal: Body Confidence.

Look Forward to Attracting, then Announcing Your Positive Body Image

Working with a body image expert coach can provide a short cut to the process of accepting your body as your Best Friend. Allowing the coach to repeat “And what else?” until you provide the real answer to the question in the safety of the relationship eases the transition to establishing the intimate relationship you and your body had at birth. Working with your body you understand what you do not want (contrast) and you become clear on what you do want and that clarity attracts it easily. When you include your body in the process, you double the positive energy behind your unified efforts to reach the same goal.

The simple tool, the question ‘and what else?’ allows you to go beyond the superficial into the heart of your desires, not someone else’s desires for you. Acknowledge your individuality when applying the Law of Attraction to achieving what you want out of life, when your goals are authentic and true to you, that positive energy glows!

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Today we are exploring how to ask the question ‘what else?’ with our bodies in order to be more in alignment and to fully understand your body’s needs physically and psychologically. This will help us better create the body image stories that we tell ourselves.

How to maintain a better body image daily

If you have phrases that you repeat every day, or pictures you look at to keep your desires in front of your mind, I’d like for you to go a step deeper today with a new technique.

It’s called the “What Else’ technique and it can help you in your personal or professional life.

How to apply the ‘what else’ technique to you and your body

When you feel your body is in need of something, ask her, “And what else?”

I truly believe that when you learn to ask your body what she wants, the two of you will get on the same page, and start achieving the things you desire!

For example…you want:

• A better body….and what else?
• Thinner thighs…and what else?
• To lose 15 pounds of “baby weight”… and what else?
• For my clothes to fit better…and what else?
• To feel lighter…and what else?

In personal and professional relationships, we all know the first answer is not the only answer, and rarely the best answer. That’s why remembering the question – “And what else?” to use as a follow up question always provides deeper answers until you reach the heart of the issue.

The answers to this question are between you and your very best friend, your body. So there’s no need to shy away from the difficult questions about what you want for your body, and perhaps are “afraid” to ask? The basic principle of the Body Knowledge System® is total trust and ease of communication between you and your body. The openness between whatever question you ask of her and the answers you receive can only create the positive energy to actually accomplish your basic goal: Body Confidence.

Let’s eliminate any negativity around our body issues!

Next time you think about what you want out of life, I encourage you to be brave enough to dig deeper into your objectives behind creating those desires in the first place.

So, when you go to cut out a picture or write a wish, remember to ask “and what else” to see if that’s your real desire, or someone else’s desire for you. What you want out of life can be authentic and true to you!

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“You must have been a beautiful baby,

You must have been a wonderful child.”

-Johnny Mercer

You were born with the best body image possible. At birth your thoughts were without judgment.  Your thoughts were pure expressions of what your body communicated in the moment. Happy, alert, warm, comfortable, and safe feelings sent by your body directly to your brain and expressed directly by your body. As pure ego, your vibration operated at an extremely high level, because of the purity of that positive communication between your body and your brain.  You expressed your positive feelings through your body’s contentment.

As an innocent beautiful baby, you attracted attention naturally. All you had to do was “be”, simply exist. Then, your appearance was more than accepted, it attracted positive attention from everyone. Regardless of what you wore or how much you weighed, your presence on the planet inspired smiles and warmth from everyone around you. You and your body were one, united in survival and growth. In order to make that happen, you smiled, cooed, giggled, drooled and batted your eyes at your caregivers.

How does this relate to your body image as an adult?

As an adult, our survival depends only on ourselves, not our caregivers.

To bring back that pure high vibration of infancy, reunite with your body to strengthen your presence in your world. The Body Knowledge System® teaches the importance of reuniting with your body to improve your body image through a simple process designed to increase your health and well being. Because each of us is unique, you are in charge of your process. As you progress in the Body Knowledge System® you will feel more energy at a higher vibration every day of your practice.

Body Knowledge System® Brings You Back to You

The basic principle in the Body Knowledge System® is ending the estrangement between you and your body. Reuniting you with your body is as easy as re-establishing the open communication you were born with—the energy that raised your vibration so positively as an infant.

Most of us live our lives unaware of our body’s importance, until something goes wrong. Illness, injury, or chronic pain gets our immediate attention, and as our body’s caregiver THEN we divert our attention to remedying the situation. Perhaps our lack of constant communication with our bodies allowed us to miss her earlier attempts at alerting us of an imbalance that resulted in this distraction.

Holistic and integrative medical theory supports the importance of considering the entire person when considering treatment for illness or injury. Logically, whole body unity should contribute to improving our daily lives as well.

The Body Knowledge System® approaches the concept of body image from the holistic point of view. In order to improve our body image, the first step is going within to raise our personal vibration. As in all things pertaining to the Law of Attraction, it occurs in the present and produces results in the future.

“You must have been a beautiful baby,

Cos, baby look at you now!” Johnny Mercer

Begin your path back to your birthright, the best body image that will ignite your high level of energy to carry you through and with all of what you desire for yourself and others.

 I believe you are ready to read my Ebook: 5 Easy Steps to a Better Body Image.

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