A recent study from Harvard University revealed the one word that is used in an online dating profile that is a turn-off to potential dates, male or female is….wait for it:

“Happy!”

HUH?

This contradicts common sense, lyracists, and the law of attraction.

“Everybody loves a lover,” right?

Not so, say the online social scholars at Harvard University. When you post the word “Happy” as part of your profile, expect a pass from those who may like your face, your background, your interests, you!

At the heart of Body Confidence is happiness, that feeling of contentment with yourself as expressed in your posture, movement, and speech is attractive to others. At least to others you hope to impress, or attract.

The Law of Attraction is based on raising your vibration so that you will attract what you want, (happiness), not what you don’t want, (loneliness). Raising your personal vibration means being “happy”, or at least acting as if you are happy.

The bottom line is always who do you want to spend time with? A positive, happy person or a Debbie Downer!

Body Confidence is always positive, so never be afraid to say so—just don’t use the word “happy” when registering your online dating profile. 😉

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“It takes as long as it takes you to release the RESISTANCE. Could be 30 years, could be 40 years, could be 50 years, could be a week. Could be tomorrow afternoon.” ~Abraham-Hicks

A recent phone call with a potential client still frustrates me, and not because of her reluctance to commit to the help she sought by calling me, but because her resistance reached out to me as she told me her story. A victim of sexual abuse as a child, she packed on the pounds to protect herself from “attracting” that kind of attention as she matured into adulthood. After years of therapy, dieting, and training programs that produced the yo-yo results we are all familiar with, she opted for bariatric surgery to control her intake of calories. When she contacted me, she called out of apparent desperation for my experience in giving my clients the confidence they need to continue their commitment to themselves.

After the exchange of emails and phones calls explaining our one-on-one coaching process and the guarantee of my support through a successful outcome; she continued to provide reasons she could not commit to the body knowledge system. As I met her every objection with a solution, she indicated she would get back to me with her commitment in a week. A week later, she called with another reservation, another excuse, another reason to resist the help she had sought when she first contacted me as a reference from her close friend, one of my successful clients.

What disturbs me is not her reluctance to commit to a coaching program, but the paradox of her seeking me out to help her, and then when help is offered, her resistance to accepting it.

There are many roads to a goal: each path presents specific challenges and obstacles, so it is up to us to decide which route offers the best possibility for success.

To get to body positive from body shaming, body negative, requires the release of your resistance to get what you want for yourself.

Once we decide on a direction, what prevents us from taking the first step?

Fear.

FEAR: False Evidence appearing Real

Our fear is based on our past experience, yet it is from the future, which has not happened yet…although intellectually it makes no sense to be afraid of things that have not happened yet, emotionally, mentally our imagination makes our fears into a reality (at least in our minds) and if you follow the downside of LOA, then you will “attract” the events as you are imagining them…horrible as they are!

Fear manifests itself as resistance: the “yes, but” response when we are asked for a commitment to our goal. The excuses are all familiar:

• Not enough money
• Not enough time
• Not enough energy
• Not enough motivation
• Not enough desire

It all boils down to the resistance we all feel around change…positive, negative; it matters not, whenever challenged to leave our comfort zone our initial reaction is NO!

As unhappy as we think we are (or we feel we are) with where we are now, even the promise of a better outcome is not enough to raise our vibration, or energy level, to MOVE toward the solution.

How to overcome the power of inertia?

Commitment to make a change.

Notice, I didn’t say Change!

Nor did I say Make a Change!

I said, “commitment.” Commitment is the most personal word in that phrase, because it means an agreement between you and yourself. Stating a commitment to another person may work, if you’re a child and other-directed, but you’re an adult and the only person you answer to is yourself.

So, let’s begin there: commit yourself to yourself.

Then ask for help from a coach to guide you with their expertise to keep your commitment to yourself.

Mind Set vs. Body Set

In order to get what you want for yourself, regardless of the method you use, to be successful requires alignment between your body’s (your heart’s desire) intention and your mind’s intentions. For the LAW of Attraction to work, to be effective, this is not just a preference, it’s a requirement.

When the law of attraction is not working for you, it’s because of an unconscious resistance you are unaware of, but its presence lowers your vibration. As Joe Vitale said in a prior issue of the Law of Attraction Magazine (page 9, October, 2016) when “counter-intentions present within you, that is thoughts and beliefs that run contrary to your conscious wishes”, they prevent you from reaching the results you want.

So when your mind says” yes”, your body says” yes”, but your mouth says “no”, that resistance is stressful. And stress always puts brakes on the positive energy, high vibration the LOA requires to work in your best interest.

The solution is to align your inner guidance system (your body) with your outer response system (your mind attached to your mouth).

That’s what the Body Knowledge System® is all about: combining the power within your body to the purpose within your mind. That alignment makes all things possible!

So how do you achieve that alignment?

Do-It-Yourself can work, if you work it.

Here are three suggestions to apply when you seek a Better Body image, body confidence or want to feel positive about your body:

• Meditate: to open your mind to your body’s awesome inspiration.
• Move, move, move: to allow your body to share her joy with your mind.
• Manifest your body’s knowledge with help from a body knowledge expert.

If Doing-It-Yourself fails to provide enough positive energy to attract the positive energy you seek, it’s not a disgrace seek help—from someone who knows how to get you from where you are, to where you want to be. Reach out to a mentor to guide you back to your core, your body. Together you will overcome any resistance to achieving your goals.

It’s time to short circuit the downside as you realize the upside with a little help from your friends, including your BFF, your body…allow your body to befriend you, so the two of you will achieve the body confidence you both deserve.

Where and How to start?

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